It's been a long time since I've written another post. A lot of things have happened since then. I believe the last time I posted something on this blog, I was in the middle of my studies and I was in no mood of sharing anything to any medium or audience whatsoever. I was in a bit of a hectic situation and my focus was all over the place. But thankfully, now that things have settled down, I want to write a blog post that serves as an update and also as a sharing medium where I intend to put my plans for the future on the table for everyone to see. I'm not sure what I'm trying to achieve through doing that but I hope it could and would give you readers out there a tiny bit of something.
In terms of my current academic situation, well, there is none. I am now thankfully free of any academic situation. I've finished all my duties in high school and I as of the 13th of May I have officially graduated from High School. It's been a wild 3 years and I really feel so relieved that I've finally met the finish line. All the late night and early morning routines will be put on a pause now and I can take a really deep breath without having to worry whether a corner of my brain would be aching the next minute or not. It really is a free sensation. The sensation is only amplified by the fact that I am also lucky enough to be accepted in one of the best universities in Indonesia without having to participate in any form of test. I have been deemed qualified through my school grades. Of course, I feel a bit burdened by the fact that a lot of my friends don't share the same good fortune. But honestly, on a personal level, it really feels good to be able to just breathe. I feel light as a feather and I'm grateful for that.
However, what bothers me about this condition that I'm in is the fact that I currently do not have a goal to pursue. The absence of this "goal" kind of bothers me. It bothers me up to a point where I feel like I don't even have an urgency to wake up every morning. Perhaps it sounds like a backlash compared to the previous paragraphs. And that's the thing. I'm not sure how to explain it.
I think there are a certain number of people who can't function without a goal in their lives. A purpose, if you like it that way. I don't necessarily consider myself as one of those people. I'm not sure I am. But even so, I certainly exhibit the symptoms.
That "longing" for purpose persuaded me to try and find something to do. Something to chase. I decided to apply for a part-time job as a barista at a local cafe. I have been working for a month now and so far I really enjoy it. With every passing day, I get to learn new things and meet new people. This new job gave me a chance to improve myself in ways that I couldn't have fathomed before. I look forward to continuing working perhaps until I start studying in Uni.
So I guess the lesson here is to not stop at a certain achievement. I believe that in order for us to keep improving as human beings, we have to stay hungry. With each purpose that we've fulfilled, we should always look out for more. I hope you agree with that as well :)
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